Last Updated:11:56 AM EST 10/16/07 Section: Lifestyles

A majority of the people I meet wonder how I think of the ideas of my columns. Also, they usually ask me how I even think of half of the stuff I say. Yes, it is true, I have an interesting sense of humor and it does scare the heck out of people. Even my family is scared of it. Well, my dad not so much, but my mom is always under the impression that my humor will get me gunned down on the sidewalk between Ward and Basil.

One source of my humor comes from my father. See you have to understand, my father, Ronald Pohorence, he was born and raised in Cleveland, Ohio. He did not have everything that I have today. So he had to work hard for everything he had. Through this incoherent rambling, which goes completely off topic, I might add, he usually says Cleveland and the state of Ohio are the greatest ever. Might I digress? It is true that if you meet my father, you will see the Pohorence charm or the humor it creates. So I concoct this from family genes. But like Tenacious D, the art needs a source of inspirado. This should not be confused with Desperado, a sweet tune by The Eagles, or El Camino the car/truck made by the fine people at Chevrolet. It should be noted, my dad actually wanted to own an El Camino.

A real source of inspirado comes from the world we live in. For instance, as I write this, I am currently watching MTV. As South Park once stated about this network (wait, can you actually call it a network?) it's the network for kids twelve and younger where we decide everything that is cool. Here's Kurt Loder with the news, which is cool. It is humorous because it is cool that kids have an entertainment network where adults act like its so exciting when JT has a new hot single and people cannot get enough of it.

Then it goes on about how we need four hundred makeover shows, to prove that MTV is the leading cause for how shallow and vain America can be. Also, on the episode of Made, some kid who wanted to be a soccer player (a failed attempt in the previous episode), goes to New York to do some lame thing. MTV tempts you into thinking it is a good thing, but in essence this is me wasting a half hour I could use to learn knitting.

Inspirado can also come from outside sources. I am writing this paragraph following a casual evening in my room. A can of Pabst Blue Ribbon, union made in the great Midwestern city of Milwaukee, is gently being processed through my system. Now, I'm not saying I'm writing this humor piece, plastered out of my mind, but it does ease the tension of my impending deadline. Also, it should be noted that I do not recommend the use of drugs to make works of art. For every Dark Side of the Moon, there's H.R. Puff 'n' Stuff.

See the inspirado for this column comes from many sources. Usually with me it's the fact that my brain is scrambling with so many pop culture references that extend well beyond Corey Feldman and how much of a street walker Britney Spears is. I mean how many people reference Kurt Loder (well, apart from me, no one).

This inspirado that I need to make my humor is without a doubt, not present in this column. I am currently searching for the inspirado to write a humorous column about something ... something … I don't know, about Lindsay Lohan and how she's a thieving (expletive deleted). I need my humor. It's how I meet chicks. Fisher Fact: 40% of readers think Kurt Loder is actually cooler than Seth Pohorence.

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